Lesson 1 - What the heck do all of those remote controls do?

Almost 53 years old & I'm finally learning the art of - - operating the tv. First you pick up one of the 6 remote controls. Then you just stare at it wondering if it's the right one & what to do next. They all have a little button that says ON/OFF or POWER. But that is deceiving. Read on. I know which one turns the tv on/off. That is the one I use for volume & changing the channel. After that, it's anyone's guess. When I ask which one I should use for the DVD, I'm told "The Sony one." Fine, but 3 of them say Sony on them. Will I be getting any clearer instructions than that, boys? I sure hope so.

I never considered myself technologically challenged until I had 6 remotes in front of me & a blank tv screen.

When Lewis & Alex are gone for a while I will not know how to use the DVD player, the DVR player or even the old video recorder. Forget completely about the home theatre system, the stereo or the separate CD player. They all have their own remotes that I will not even be touching. As far as the home theatre, I don't care if the sound comes through the ceiling at this point. I just want to know how to work the damn thing.

With my digital camera, I took pictures of all of the remotes & then of the one main one itself. The pictures are 8x10 & came out very clear. Lewis & Alex have been giving me instructions on how to operate each component. I've got little arrows on the pictures from button to button, instructions on another page, more arrows & lines on other pictures. I probably should color-code my instructions as well. I've already given each remote a number. Numbers & colors. I'm doing my best.

Alex told me this last night: If you want to turn on the tv & you hit ON & it doesn't go on, then you have to point it to this one black box, hit CABLE, TV, & then ON again.
Why?
I want to know why I can't just hit ON to make the tv come on. How hard can that be? But that's not why we're doing this.
(That's probably like the green button on the bottom left of your computer screen that says START. You have to click START to get to the point where it says you can shut down your computer. So you have to hit START to stop. Makes about as much sense as this whole tv thing.)

And why do I have to point some remotes at certain components of the system & press buttons & point other remotes at other components when I press buttons? Figuring out which remotes to use for what isn't confusing enough? I heard the term "universal remote". Why can't we have that? And which box would I point it at?

I need to learn all of this before they leave. Lewis just says, "I've told you this 100 times." Alex is more patient. I'm learning it from him. Hopefully, I'll repay his kindness one day & be the one to teach him to drive rather than his dad.

My next lesson is tonight. We're going to watch something we recorded on the DVR & I will take notes as it's happening. After that, we will put a DVD in & I will be walked through the whole process.

First you have to get up to press the power button on this top receiver. Now let me ask you - - - Why, with all of these remotes, should I ever have to get up out of that chair? Get up ? Maybe we need a seventh remote.
Then you press the power button on the receiver on the shelf below it. (I guess this would require an extra remote as well. Or maybe we have them but he just doesn't use them for power). Then you go back to the chair & play with the remotes. I believe this is part of the home theatre system, but I can't be sure just yet. If sound comes out of the speakers in our ceiling & the windows rattle, I will know.
I just hope I'm as good a note taker as I think I am.

And don't even ask me what that other black box is in the corner of the family room that is supposed to have something to do with the whole system. I've never known what that thing is. I just know that Lewis has been saying we need a sub-woofer. Whatever that is. Just another mystery I don't care to know about. But it's probably black & it will probably sit on our floor also.

When Alex was about 7 yrs old I told him that when his dad & I were young, we would have to get up & walk across the room to change the channel or adjust the volume on the tv. He looked at me like I was crazy. I think he was first thinking I was making it up. He was wondering if I was just teasing him or if that could possibly have been true in "the olden days" when his parents were young. He did not believe me. And I would never have believed I'd be having to take lessons on how to work all of that electronics equipment in my family room. I just want to watch a couple of good shows, every episode in every season of "Northern Exposure" another couple of seasons of "Arrested Development" & maybe rent a movie or two. Is that asking too much? We already have the "Northern Exposure" & "Arrested Development" DVDs. So the rest should be easy. Right? Easy? Does that word come into play anywhere in this whole thing? I'll keep you posted after lesson 2. I know you can't wait.

Hugs,
Candace